Butterflies are fragile and almost
defenseless creatures but rely on a variety of strategy
to protect them, blending into their environment so well
it is almost impossible to detect them.
I learned early about pain
and loss but my ability to take wing became my major
defense.
My father, an intellectual, arrived
as a young man from
Austria
with a portfolio of plays, poetry and short stories.
He spent his life in search
of a dream to become a great writer that did not
materialize.
My quiet small mother was
born in a small village in
Hungary
and she gave me the freedom to explore the world.
Her warmth was my mainstay.
In her eyes I could do no
wrong.
My silent melancholy father
rarely talked.
I grew up in a home where
conversation was restrained and I found myself doing all
the talking.
It became the norm but I
desperately needed to hear sound even if it was only
coming from my own lips.
My brother, Morton, was an
intelligent,
composed gray eyed boy who
also had a dream but death at the age of fourteen killed
the dream and left me to grow up alone and lonely.
I remember visiting Morton
in the hospital as he lay foaming at the mouth in a
coma.
My life was never again the
same.
I was ten years old.
I was friendly but had no real
friends.
I was lonely but did not
spend much time alone.
The beginning of my life was
with no road map, no directions only following the scent
of excitement, adventure and love.
Watching a butterfly zigzag
aimlessly across the meadow on a sunny morning, it could
easily be taken for nature’s most carefree vagabond –
unhurried, unburdened, and even a little ditzy.
But butterflies are
purposeful, aggressive, sexually driven and smarter than
most people think.
This is the beginning of the book and seems to be
necessary since it is basically a memoir.
This introduces my family; then it can continue with the
first chapter which you included.
"In the Beginning".